A Murderer’s Guide to Cleaning: And Other Stories from My Life as a Probation Officer - Elizabeth Baxter

Written by Elizabeth Baxter
Read by Elizabeth Baxter, Antonia Bearmish
Format: M4B
Bitrate: Variable
Unabridged

Listening Length
7 hours and 40 minutes

Publication date
April 16, 2026

Elizabeth Baxter has heard it all. Thieves, rapists, drug dealers, burglars, murderers, abusers and arsonists - they’ve all confided in her.

Some are harder to shake than others. There’s sweet, baby-faced Stella who hurled a brick through her ex’s window and threatened to cut off his… well, you get the picture. Jake, who burned down his grandfather’s shed and prized model railway collection. And who could forget Steve, who set up a complex marmite-based distillery in his cell. The moonshine wasn’t for drinking though, but for cleaning. He remains, in Elizabeth’s professional opinion, Britain’s most fastidious murderer.

Recalling her 25 years in Britain’s probation service, Elizabeth Baxter offers a fresh perspective on care within the criminal justice system. Warm and humane, A Murderer’s Guide to Cleaning pays tribute to the work of probation officers everywhere, who not only protect the public, but often act as the final safety net for society’s most vulnerable, from teenage asylum seekers to survivors of domestic abuse.